My Redemption

But I want to feel like Andy Dufrane
when he gets the books for the beginning
of the library after 6 years of sending
letters to the state for funding. Having
the thought to now send 2 letters a week
instead of one and becoming more persistent
and becoming even more absurd
locking a guard in the bathroom
and playing a piece from
Mozart's Marriage of Figaro
over the loud speaker to all
the prisoners in the court yard.
And when the warden looks in
I wanna look him in the eye
for a short moment turn the volume up
and turn away knowing that the next day,
I'd return to the courtyard or the hole
or my job or whatever else it was I do
on a daily basis.

Some people want to be on the rooftop
of a building drinking beers after laying
down tar, like waiters and waitresses
taking shots at a bar in the middle
of their shift in front of the customers
to feel more human. Some people
want to feel like that moment
when Andy escapes jail
and is looking up at the sky
with arms outstretched. Not me
I want to live absurdly all the time
and play Mozart over loud speakers
to all the prisoners in the courtyard.